#40ish feeling guilty and crap for not seeing your old friends more?
Updated: Feb 1, 2019
Recently my best friend at school got in touch out of the blue. We're both 47. At 18, after school we headed off travelling separately and we managed, against the odds, not to stay in touch. He went to India to get to know his Indian relations and India itself and I went to Central America to hone my Spanish before we both headed into different university courses at different universities. Life seemed so long then. We saw each other once or twice before university and then nothing. Subconsciously school was a mixed experience and so it felt safer to leave it all behind I think. Anyway, 28 years later he mentions me to a friend one afternoon who says "you're always talking about him, why don't you google him and get in touch?" He had tried before but this time he googled my full name #barnabyhatch not barney hatch and found a number for https://www.taltonlodge.com/ . Typically absurd, he called himself Harold when my wife answered and asked who was calling, suspecting a sales call (he said he did that so as not to freak me out). I was pretty stunned anyway.
#Graysonperry in the #descentofman is right, we blokes are hopeless. As it turned out we'd both been talking about each other nostalgically for years and he was as surprised to have got me in one hit as I was to be talking to him. So the call was a milder version of the awkward rediscovering of a long lost sibling. We could detect our minds whirring with internal questions at either end of the telephone while we floundered for the right conversational tone to strike when talking to someone with whom we had been so close, but who had become estranged. My questions were things like; I wonder what he's like now? - he said he's married but I wonder who? and will she be like? Does he have a regular job or is he still winging it? Has he got baggage? Rubbish questions I know but that's what happened. Anyway we've agreed to meet up so the answers will come. If you're interested I'll let you know how it went.
It did make me realise though how valuable it is to stay in touch with #oldfriends especially once your children spread their wings and you've more weekend time. Now that we're older, older friends have dispersed and a drink at the pub is not feasible. More effort is required to keep up with everyone. I now find myself booking #weekendbreaks not just with my wife but also to see old uni friends and have fun together - #walking, #cycling, #eating and #makingmerry. As such I am now the very customer we set up our Talton Lodge & Talton House business to cater for; #friendsreunions and #familyreunions. If time is short you can have just one annual gathering and see everyone in one hit. The moral of the story is don't lose touch with your #oldpals. Sure, invest in your pension but getting old with no mates is no fun, invest time, love and effort into the friendships you want to maintain now. Come to #taltonlodge and have fun. We're right in the middle of England so easy travelling for your #dispersedfriends.